A victim often hurts people to make them pay attention to their pain. Every adult has an inner child who needs attention. However, only adults can understand that they have an inner child, and that they must integrate this aspect of identity in order to become happy. Happiness is metrically defined in psychology through an attribution of 40% of our activity becoming intentional: that which we freely choose to do. A person who seeks to become self-aware, tunes into their subconsciousness, and therefore; inner-child. Usually we will find that where someone is causing others to hurt, they are projecting their own pain on to others to gain attention to hurt that has been ignored, much of this from childhood. Hurt people, hurt people.
Loved people, love people.
Every human being seeks to be the object of affection and the centre of attention of those we want to love us. This attention, or the deficit of attention, frequently affects our self-regulated behaviour. The petulant child will lash out at a parent who is not giving attention. Lifelong hurt accumulates from neglect.
This becomes simple when we understand that the opposite of love is not hate. The opposite of love is neglect. In fact, anything we hate, we are giving attention to because we love this thing, this person, but we aren't getting the responses that we want. Hate therefore, is a childish form of love.
Dissociation. Disconnection. Isolation. Dissolution.
Association. Connection. Community. Resolution.